July 11, 2011
I'm going to write about Proverbs 27 first. This chapter talks about how important it is to have a friend who will be honest with you about all things—your strengths and weaknesses.
Proverbs 27:5 - It is better to correct someone openly than to have love and not show it.
Proverbs 27:6 - The slap of a friend can be trusted to help you but the kisses of an enemy are nothing but lies.
Proverbs 27:9 - The sweet smell of perfume and oils is pleasant and so is good advice from a friend.
Proverbs 27:17 - As iron sharpens iron, so people can improve each other.
I'm grateful to have friends like this in my life. But then comes Proverbs 26. There are some people in your life who make it their life's purpose to not strengthen and improve you; their purpose is to hurt you. That type of person is toxic and brings harm and damage to your life. Unfortunately, often that type of person comes from within your family of origin. If it is an outside person it is much easier to distance yourself and protect yourself from them. But from my personal experience, it is an entirely different story if the person comes from within your family.
I tried everything under my control and in my power to help my sister. I tried putting my own needs aside. I put up with my sister's actions, attitudes, hurts, and other things I would have never allowed or accepted from anyone else in my life. But there comes a point in time when you realize that not only can't you change the other person, but you can't help them either. The best (and sometimes the only) thing you can do is distance yourself from them. Something is broken within them and you can't fix it.
When someone has all sorts of conflict in their lives you finally have to look at the common denominator. I describe as the Charlie Brown character "Pig Pen" effect. Like Pig Pen's circle of dirt swirling around him, some people have trouble and conflict swirling around them wherever they go. They are just plain toxic and you can't change or fix them.
Proverbs 26:24-27 - "Those who hate you may try to fool you with their words, but in their minds they are planning evil. People's words may be kind, but don't believe them, because their minds are full of evil thoughts. Lies can hide hate, but the evil will be plain to everyone. Whoever digs a pit for others will fall into it. Whoever tries to roll a boulder down on others will be crushed by it."
Proverbs 27:19 - "As water reflects your face, so your mind shows what kind of person you are."
Like I said earlier, the truth is the truth. I believe the promises found in Proverbs 26:2 - "Curses will not harm anyone who is innocent; they are like sparrows or swallows that fly around and never land." While I don't have the power or ability to "fix" others, the Great Physician does, and that is still my prayer.
Interesting that the Life Lesson for Chapter 26 sent me to read Leviticus 26:14-35, the very scriptures I referred to in my writings for Proverbs 25.
Next Entry: Proverbs 28
I'm going to write about Proverbs 27 first. This chapter talks about how important it is to have a friend who will be honest with you about all things—your strengths and weaknesses.
Proverbs 27:5 - It is better to correct someone openly than to have love and not show it.
Proverbs 27:6 - The slap of a friend can be trusted to help you but the kisses of an enemy are nothing but lies.
Proverbs 27:9 - The sweet smell of perfume and oils is pleasant and so is good advice from a friend.
Proverbs 27:17 - As iron sharpens iron, so people can improve each other.
I'm grateful to have friends like this in my life. But then comes Proverbs 26. There are some people in your life who make it their life's purpose to not strengthen and improve you; their purpose is to hurt you. That type of person is toxic and brings harm and damage to your life. Unfortunately, often that type of person comes from within your family of origin. If it is an outside person it is much easier to distance yourself and protect yourself from them. But from my personal experience, it is an entirely different story if the person comes from within your family.
I tried everything under my control and in my power to help my sister. I tried putting my own needs aside. I put up with my sister's actions, attitudes, hurts, and other things I would have never allowed or accepted from anyone else in my life. But there comes a point in time when you realize that not only can't you change the other person, but you can't help them either. The best (and sometimes the only) thing you can do is distance yourself from them. Something is broken within them and you can't fix it.
When someone has all sorts of conflict in their lives you finally have to look at the common denominator. I describe as the Charlie Brown character "Pig Pen" effect. Like Pig Pen's circle of dirt swirling around him, some people have trouble and conflict swirling around them wherever they go. They are just plain toxic and you can't change or fix them.
Proverbs 26:24-27 - "Those who hate you may try to fool you with their words, but in their minds they are planning evil. People's words may be kind, but don't believe them, because their minds are full of evil thoughts. Lies can hide hate, but the evil will be plain to everyone. Whoever digs a pit for others will fall into it. Whoever tries to roll a boulder down on others will be crushed by it."
Proverbs 27:19 - "As water reflects your face, so your mind shows what kind of person you are."
Like I said earlier, the truth is the truth. I believe the promises found in Proverbs 26:2 - "Curses will not harm anyone who is innocent; they are like sparrows or swallows that fly around and never land." While I don't have the power or ability to "fix" others, the Great Physician does, and that is still my prayer.
Interesting that the Life Lesson for Chapter 26 sent me to read Leviticus 26:14-35, the very scriptures I referred to in my writings for Proverbs 25.
Next Entry: Proverbs 28
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